Little Sam kicked his feet in the air, trying to capture them with his hands. Frodo finished diapering the infant with perfect confidence and skill, then took one tiny, soft foot in his mouth and pretended to eat it -- which elicited giggles from the child. He then lifted the baby and sat down in Bilbo’s favorite rocking chair.
“Remarkable,” Bilbo sighed in relief. “When I told the Gamgees we could watch him until Bell is over her cold, I never dreamed they’d say ‘yes’. I don’t know the first thing about little ones.”
“But I do,” Frodo said, making silly faces at Sam. “They’ve watched me with the baby for months, every time I visit. They might not trust you, Bilbo,” he continued with a grin, “but they know I won’t let anything happen to this sweet child.”
“Impudent lad.”
“Impudent, do you hear that, Sam? ” Frodo addressed the baby. “Can you say im-pu-dent?”
“Of course he can't, ” Bilbo chuckled.
“You have to address babies seriously,” Frodo informed his uncle. “How else will they learn to speak properly?”
Bilbo was just glad that the Ordeal of the Diaper was over, for the moment. “I need some tea,” he said, heading for the kitchen. “I’ll bring you a slice of that lemon bread.”
“And one of those hard biscuits for Sam to chew on, please,” Frodo said. “The rascal is gnawing on my buttons.” He lowered his voice. “Aren’t you, Sammy wammy? Aren’t you trying to gobble up my button wuttons?”
“What was that, Frodo?" Bilbo called out.
“Nothing, Bilbo,” Frodo replied hastily. “I was just reminding Sam about proper speech etiquette and linguistics.”
Sam looked up at Frodo expectantly.
“Whew, he almost caught us,” Frodo whispered to the baby. He gently disengaged the tiny hands from his shirt. “Shall we bounce-bounce? Shall we go bouncy wouncy, Sammy wammy?” He bounced Sam very gently on one knee, the baby’s happy gurgles filling the air.
In the kitchen, Bilbo smiled to himself, his heart light. “Sammy
wammy” was in good hands indeed, and he supposed it mattered not
at all if the the child’s visit was – or was not – linguistically
sound.
sequel: Discoveries