It is over. Though it was truly over
long ago, most of the leaders of the rebellion have come at last to the
Halls of Mandos. Maglor and Maedhros were the last.
Maedhros
should be here shortly; but as for Maglor, he must surely be alive, for
I, Feanor, have not been sent word of his death. Long have I been
here in these halls, thinking about my deeds, about what drove me to
them,
about those who suffered because of me. I have been here long; for
though
I was the first to swear that terrible oath I was one of the first to
be
released from it.
What folly! Even at my death,
I saw that we could not win, and yet I forced my sons to swear my oath
again. But now we are all here, my sons and my brothers and their
sons, all save Maglor, who was not driven to death by my oath.
Would that I had been there that day with
my father! As Morgoth attacked my home at Formenos I should have been
there.
At worst my journey here would have been sped, and much less evil have
come upon Arda. Or had I offered the Silmarilli to Yavanna as she
asked, the Valar may have gone to war with Morgoth sooner. Then
my
sons would have been safe. But that was not how it was to be.
But, could it be that some good came from
my folly? Would the Valar have acted in time? Certainly had
we not left Valinor to make war with Morgoth, then he would have
overrun
Beleriand, then all of Middle-earth before the Valar had time to
act.
For many, many years the Noldor kept Morgoth in Angband. But, I
do
not seek to justify what I have done, only to seek comfort in the good
that came from it.
I meet now my sons often, and we discuss times
before our exile, and of great deeds done in Middle-earth, by Man and
Noldo
and Sinda alike, and we take council and design things of great skill
and
beauty. At times I am also permitted to meet with my father and
mother.
I do not think the Valar would deny my father this.
It is good, also, that the Silmarilli are
safe. Earendil the Mariner, who came in time to save the Children
of Iluvatar from Morgoth, now bears one far above in the sky as a sign
of hope to all. Maglor entrusted one to the sea; he survived the
oath. Maedhros, sadly, cast himself into the earth, and so the
third
lies within Arda itself. But all three are now kept from
Morgoth.
In time they shall be brought together again. This I feel to be
true.
Then perhaps they shall be used to heal the hurts I have caused, and
all
shall see the light of an age long past.
Would that I could take the blame upon myself, so
that my sons and my family could leave in peace. Yet I feel that
they will be released soon enough. As for me, my time here in the
Halls of Mandos shall not end for many years, both of Middle-Earth and
Aman. But that is how it should be, that is how it must be; that
I alone be made to suffer most for my oath.
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